Frequently Asked Questions

What is a Bat Mitzvah?

Bar and bat mitzvah mean, literally, “son and daughter of the commandment.” While bar and bat mitzvah are often used to refer to the ceremony, the terms also refer to the child. Thus, Paige may be referred to as a “bat mitzvah.”

Historically, a bat mitzvah represented a ceremonial recognition that a young person had reached the age when she was no longer a minor according to Jewish law and thereby took on new religious privileges and responsibilities of an adult.

For us, the bat mitzvah ceremony marks the start not of adulthood, but the acknowledgment of adolescence. It is a coming of age. It signifies a young person’s desire to become more responsible for her own decisions and actions, and to identify with the many previous generations of Jewish people who have done so. It is also an opportunity for the individual to explore family history and values, consider personal beliefs and self-discovery, and view her role in our larger community.

What will Paige do during the service?

After several years of study, Paige will have the honor of helping lead the service. Paige’s Hebrew name is Pazit Shira, or “golden song,” and it is fitting that she will lead us in song. She will also give a d’var torah (a brief teaching) related to the Torah portion on which she has focused.

I’m not familiar with what happens at a bat mitzvah. What do I do during the service?

Whether this is your first service or you have done the Jewish summer camp b’nai mitzvah circuit, Temple Shir Tikvah is a progressive, welcoming community which strives to help everyone feel included regardless of one’s background.

There will be song books and programs (…assuming we make them in time!) for you on the chairs. While some of the service is in Hebrew, English transliterations are available in the song books. Shir Tikvah translates to “Song of Hope,” and the music, led by our cantor Beth Levin, is one of our favorite aspects of the community. We hope you will join us in celebratory song.

What is Paige’s Mitzvah Project?

A Mitzvah Project is a meaningful way for a bat mitzvah to engage in some of the most important values of Judaism—repairing the world (tikkun olam) and engaging in acts of loving kindness (g'milut chasadim).

For her Mitzvah Project, Paige ran a soccer equipment donation drive to help put sports equipment in the hands of those who need it most so that that every child has a chance to play.

What should I wear?

Guests at a bat mitzvah celebration generally wear dressy clothes, similar perhaps to a cocktail party. Our temple does not require shoulders to be covered or kippot/yarmulkes (head coverings). Come ready to share in our joy!

What time should I arrive?

The service starts at 4:00 p.m., so you will want to arrive at Temple Shir Tikvah by 3:45 p.m.

Where should I park for the service?

Because of its small size, the parking lot at Temple Shir Tikvah is not available for general guest parking. Guests instead should park at the First Congregational Church on Vine Street, just a minute walk from from the temple. There should be someone outside of the building directing you into the lot. Please check this FAQ the day before the service to confirm that nothing has changed with respect to the availability of First Congregational.

If your child is Paige’s friend attending solo, please feel free to drop them off on Vine Street right in front of the temple. Someone should be outside directing them to the appropriate door.

Please note: For anyone considering taking the commuter rail, the temple is a few minutes walk from the Winchester Center stop. For anyone taking a cab or ride service, please make sure your driver knows you are going to Temple Shir Tikvah in Winchester. There is a congregation with the same name in a town far, far away.

What happens after the service?

The reception begins at about 6:30 p.m. at Bellevue Golf Club in Melrose. Plan to eat, drink, dance, and celebrate! The celebration will conclude at about 10:30 p.m.

My child was invited solo as Paige’s friend. How does my child get from the service to the reception?

We will have bus transportation for the kids to get from the temple to the reception. We will assume your solo child will take the bus unless you tell us otherwise when you RSVP.

My child was invited solo as Paige’s friend. When and where should I pick up my child?

You can pick up your child after the party at Bellevue Golf Club around 10:30 p.m.

I am coming from out of town. Where should I stay?

As a large city, there are numerous options for accommodations in Boston and the surrounding towns. Because the bat mitzvah is during peak fall foliage season and the weekend of the Head of the Charles, the world's largest three-day regatta, we were not able to secure a room block at a reasonable rate for guests. We recommend booking at your choice of hotel early because of the especially high number of tourists who will be in town.

Please reach out to Jane and Brett if you would like suggestions on hotels in the city or popular area towns, such as Concord, Lexington, and Cambridge.

I have more questions. What should I do?

Please reach out to Jane (617-233-8151) or Brett (617-756-1776). Texting is probably the best way to get our attention.